Ship's Blog: March, 2009

Facebook. LinkedIn. Twitter. Classmates.com. MySpace. Social networking is taking over and, frankly, some of us are not ready for it.

At least, I'm not sure I'm ready for it.

On face value, it seems like social networking on the Web is a fabulous idea. What a great way to stay connected to people, find those you've lost touch with, and strengthen bonds. You hear such wonderful stories about best friends from elementary school reconnecting and old lovers romantically encountering each other decades after they first fell in love. And I'm sure you know those people who find running a search on Facebook to be fun and exciting. Who will they find today?

I have friends like this-people for whom social networking is a welcome enhancement to their lives. I genuinely admire them, because for me, social networking not always like that. Sure, it can be enjoyable at times, but other times? It's stressful and nerve-wracking. Getting a new friend invitation can make me stop breathing momentarily, as I wonder, is this a "friend friend" or somebody I don't want to talk to?

You don't have to be a social recluse to have issues with online networking. It's often less than appealing if:

• You have good reason to avoid one or more persons from your past, particular the kind who never qualified for a restraining order, per se, but who has threatened your safety on some level,  Read more »

Kathy is out of town on a business trip at the moment, which means:

• I'm doing all sorts of crazy projects around the house and moving things, determined, as always, to reenact an episode of "While You Were Out"
• I'm experiencing constant lower back pain because of the above activities and yet I'm also forgetting to take pain reliever (because my entourage is not here)
• I am getting so caught up on paperwork that I have mentally filed anything that is going to come into the house for the next two weeks
• Our recycle bin is full to bursting and we're not even near pickup day
• I have no idea what is happening in the world of politics because it's just not the same watching Rachel Maddow without Kathy...and so I don't

The last one is interesting because for quite a long time, I never knew what was happening in politics no matter where Kathy was. Sure, I had the many years of waking up to KCBS radio and hearing their version of the news. And then there were the years of listening to NPR for long commutes and finding out so much more about the world than I was led to believe there was to know.  Read more »

Persistently looking for work in a dismal economy like this takes incredible internal fortitude. I think it's comparable to the same internal fortitude that allows some people to eat weird crap on Fear Factor. Especially when you are searching within a field that has been stripped bare of opportunities through outsourcing, it can be deeply demoralizing. That's why I've really admired how Kathy has kept doggedly pursuing possibilities over the months since she has been laid off. (For those who don't know, she worked in technology for a bank that was seized by the Feds. It's a longer story than that, but aren't they all?)

As she dealt with the ups and downs of the job search, I have to admit that I felt more and more helpless. It is my way to help people accomplish things. That's why I had a coaching business, after all. I want to make everyone's path a little easier. But what could I do?  Read more »

Then, a few weeks ago, I brightly suggested that I would help her get a job by improving our household chi. Yep, I'd feng shui her into a job!

While doing not-yet-visible web development work in the background, I've been struggling lately over... what on earth am I going to write in my blog? Does anyone actually want to read my mental meanderings? Isn't blogging terribly self indulgent?

It's the kind of thinking that doesn't get anywhere because, for the most part, blogs are self-indulgent. Of course they are! It didn't matter to me before-I still love the blogs of others that I have time to follow. Yet the latest surge in Twittering and Facebook updating makes me wonder, what really makes something interesting? Do I need to know some of what's being shared? Is it going to make my life any richer? Because, from what I can see, a few people could use a filter on their output. Or is that just me that can use the filter?

I'm so glad I'm not the type of person to think myself into tight spirals.

Tomorrow, there will be little time for blogging as I will be visiting UCSF for my re-check. (Maybe I've finally found a use for Twitter - there's always good in-the-moment material when you're visiting a cancer center.) Re-check day is pretty much my least favorite kind of day, because I keep thinking... can't these people let the cancer thing GO already? Would they please stop obsessing? I tend to think of it as the time in my life when I learned to shave my head and collected wig anecdotes to share with others. Why do these medical types have to turn it into such a downer? Sheesh.  Read more »